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1. |
U-Haul's Drag Race
03:01
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I'm not having a great time. No comfort, just blurred eyes. And I want to leave for home with you so we can unwind. Just us and new Queer Eye. And you can choose if we vent or snooze.
Blatant lies about the quality of the friendship. Fool me twice the shame goes right between my eyes. Falling backwards to old habits I'm working on for the millionth time.
An ocean of red wine. $20 cover for XY. The party blew, time for something new. There's no need to whine about something so asinine. They'll call it soon, we can sleep till noon.
Walk the line, brace yourself for when the marching stays in time. Feel the weight the world threatens with a great time. Face the chance of failure to socialize.
To recall a past time of comfort and few lies, it's starting to not be made for two.... for the better.
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2. |
Criss Angel: Minecraft
03:26
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If you feel like staying that's up to you. I'll try to get out of your way, what you're going through. I won't make a sound or turn on a light. I'll even avoid your mind and your sight.
If it'd make it less awkward I'll let you have the bed. Even though I'm high maintenance the couch'll hurt my head. You don't want me around, and that's fine. You're spending your time away from this dime.
Few turn their heads when I'm around. But c'mon it's not like you heard it'd be better if I lied. That's why I'm getting better.
Looking like I failed something: living on my own. Living like a rich patron, so comfortable. Keep looking around for the life that makes you want to say "OOOH, that's nice!"
You say that's the way it is so let me know what I can do to make it alright.
You think it's comfortable to hide away so I can do it if I want and somehow I'll get my way!
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3. |
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I know you think I want a cute guitar girl, you don't even have to say it. But you're wrong, it's obvious your confidence is getting in your way.
I could have fought for love, could have thought of a reason to keep it together and prepare for the seasonal change of heart when guilt is all I have when it comes to you.
Is it funny how I felt like mourning someone close to me? Is it worth it if I told you all about how I was feeling? Forgive me if I'm always boring you to death in your ear. It might be my fault or you don't give a shit about my year.
On what would have been 2 years I wore an outfit you picked out for me. I don't believe in fate too much cause I know it happened subconsciously.
Might be a way of paying homage to our highest points, and I don't know why I did it but it felt just like your sorely missed company.
Is it funny how I felt like mourning someone close to me? Is it worth it if I told you all about how I was feeling? Forgive me if I'm always boring you to death in your ear. It might be my fault or you don't give a shit about my year.
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4. |
John Wilkes Boof
03:06
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My hot friend, do you wanna share a cigarette? Let's go home to a place we haven't been to yet. And I know nothing but trouble comes to mind. But my taste in weekends is refined.
Personally I prefer when someone fades into the foreground of your life.
Lay on the floor, I don't know what to say anymore. I'm always on the outside hanging up here to dry. It's nice to watch the rain fall from high above the city.
Oh, you’ve got me smiling at improper times. All alone, on the overcrowded red line. If that’s the way the world works, then I’m finally ready to break it to myself.
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5. |
No Farm, No Fowl
03:53
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Wind up every happy thought you had, you thought it would never go away. End up purging every toxic jab. It’s on par to overthink it.
If you are finally letting go, that’s good. You shouldn’t wait. What’s the worst thing I could say?
If it took a half a year to address intrusive thoughts, is this the worst place I could stay?
Laying down in the off-brown colored grass, the rain felt the need to harass.
“Get out of your comfort zone,” I say with plans I postponed yet again.
If I had embedded code making it hard to learn to cope, it must be safe to say I’m on my own .
If I was a better friend with a heart that isn’t stone, I’m sure I’m a great person to have known.
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6. |
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Just cause you say you're stronger doesn't mean I'm weak or wrong. But this time it just happens to be true. Forget the thoughts you had when you were young. You know your knack for overthinking has just begun.
Emotionless toward everyone. Catatonic on the floor reaching for the thing you swore you'd never become.
I'm standing against the wall like it's a form of socializing for everyone to see. For everyone.
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7. |
~
01:05
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~
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8. |
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If I could offer advice, then I would. Meant to straighten this out like I said that I would. If I could open the door to a new skin, I would let you go first, but I'll follow you in.
Let me lay it all out so I can explain how I think all the time of how I will pay for self help that's not offered in public domain. It needs to work itself out as I disassociate.
Forgetting everything is not my style, don't know what is. But hating everyone could take a while, if you catch my drift. But lately I've been conjuring regret, but not a lot. The hardest part of letting myself go was letting you in.
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9. |
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I watched you rot outside my apartment. January winds freezing you to the ground. It's fucked up to say, but I felt jealous. Evidence of your death displayed to all those around.
Awaiting the day where I take that same fall. FUCK IT ALL!
I carry it with my now like a disease. REST IN PEACE!
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10. |
Finnish Hymn
03:49
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To forget you would honestly be amazing, so I can live daily. And what’s worse for me is that I can’t bring you up so casually. It’ll just hurt internally. And that’s too much for me.
Every time I waved I received a gaze with furrowed brows, like I did something wrong. Every light you gave has paved the way to help me think so rationally.
It’s just so exhausting to keep getting lost in a human race I’ll never understand.
If not for my insecurities, I would not accept defeat so easily here.
I’m ready to go whenever you are, that is if you want to leave. Why is it so hard to believe that
All I had was time to make it right? But I moved on because I cut it off. Even once is enough to admit that I need help. Don’t tell me I’m wrong
It’s just so unlike me to be so delightfully hateful and angrily out of hand.
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11. |
Hyundai Bloody Hyundai
01:11
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I said I’d meet you at the tap room, but later I changed my mind.
Let you know and let you down but honestly what would you find but a person faking confidence and rolling with the tide?
Unsure of the way to steer the conversation once outside.
And I always forget my body needs some rest. I would place my bet, I run from my sadness and thrive on stress.
Don’t act so surprised if I don’t feel special cause everyone loves everybody. Open up your eyes and don’t feel bad if you’re lost here cause everything’s unclear and muddy.
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12. |
J.R.R. Tone King
03:59
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Is this working? Is the record on? Is it cool if I say anything at all? Is it comforting to know I'm without structure when I do not follow my perforated seams.
Am I crumbling under pressure? An unfortunate end without any means.
Cause I've buried these harmful notions all my life. I'm married to the thought I'll never find a wife. I've carried the cost of living on my shoulders. It's making me want to get some closure.
Well maybe the last five years weren't as insincere as the healing that went unearned, just to say what I want to hear.
Is this side of me nothing special, like a piece of gum stuck under a bus seat. I owe everything to another and he's twice as good as anyone can be.
Can't help but set myself up for failure like I won't even fall in a straight line. Losing touch with all those that I held dear, missing all of the things I need to hear. It's what I need to hear.
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